Friday, May 20, 2011

You're right Beyonce...I do run the world


I'm not a huge fan of Beyonce's new song "Run The World (Girls)". I mean when I first heard it on the radio, I thought it was an old Destiny's Child song! But what song of hers doesn't sound like an old Destiny's Child song, am I right?

Then I heard about her and Jigga..."Oooh it's her chick anthem" I thought. Enough said.

The video premiered this week and again she's out performed most of the pop stars she's setting out to destroy.




Britney doesn't stand a chance...medicated hot mess.

Rhianna can't dance very well besides the ever so popular booty, booty, booty, booty rockin everywhere style.

Nicki Minaj LITERALLY can't dance very well besides the ever so popular booty, booty, booty, booty rockin everywhere style (poor big assed girl)

Lady Gaga, the coke n' booze make you look-a like-a man, beef up a little and your dancing won't look like bone on bone grindage!


For what it's worth, the girl killed it. Some of the choreography is a little much but that's what B-girl does! She will forever be a total queen and I respect that. She's danced like a bad ass for 13 years and at 30 she's still moving like an 18 year old. Props.

-D

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

I know I buy my Summers Eve at Walmart...Pretty proud of that now

Thanks to my good friend Camila E. for this fantastic video!



Mr. Ghetto's "Walmart" is already all over the Internet. A flurry of confusion is circulating this video and for good reason....there are just no words to describe how one is supposed to feel after viewing it.

I love the amount of ass but....how much ass is TOO much ass for one song? Ask my fiance and he'll tell you there is no such thing as TOO much ass.

I really have nothing else to say about it! I'm not going to complain about how Walmart is a family friendly store because its not. I have never had a pleasant experience at a Walmart and that's mostly because I'm too busy taking pictures to submit to People of Walmart (check out the AZ section. It's a clusterfuck of eyeball busting images of meth heads and Nascar enthusiasts).

I'm also not going to bitch about how these girls need to get their act together. God gave them asses like that for a reason! I believe the scripture did call for it after all



And God said "There will be ass'th to shake. And men from all walks shall make it rain, make it rain on dem hoes"
-D

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Zombie Proof House



So I read about this amazing invention about a month ago. Reading it, I thought "this is what all houses should be like, because lets face it...we are a culture that is afraid of everything".

The windows that hinge closed, the one ramp into the house thats on the second floor, the genius location of "in the middle of fucking no where" is all fantastic.

But then I had a detailed dream involving that house and found some problems with its design!

1. The pool room has no protection: Unless this is a totally stand alone addition to the luxuriance of the house, there is at least one door that leads to the interior of the house should zombies attack. Seeing as it's blue tinted windows stand out even during the day, zombies will try to get in there first. Even during Z-day I may want to take a dip...

2. Air vents. I don't see any but they've got to be on top of the house somewhere. Where is the air coming from? Is it like a panic room with a small tubular vent? Does the house have its own air supply during attacks and when will that run out? If they have regular air ducts I think its safe to say the inhabitants would be screwed within a few hours.

3. The retractable shed. It's obvious it's not sturdy. Even the sturdiest of those types of doors can be pushed down by an angry mob. We're not sure how smart these zombies are but if they got something to knock it down with (which would require team work), that wall doesn't stand a chance. Behind that its just glass!

4. The indoor staircase. It's not retractable and if the shed door were to come down, I'd want it to be. At least then you'd have more of a shot of keeping them downstairs, right? Not that that would help any since the food and cooking supplies are downstairs.

5. There is no additional downstairs. If we're going to make a zombie proof house, why not make a shelter below it?

Did the Dahlia think too much into this? Probably. She's not ashamed 'neither...

-D

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Did she really just say that?




Rhianna, Robyn whatever your name is...put DOWN the ecstasy, girl. It'll mess up your back!



"California King Bed" is the new video by our lovely Na-Na (sounds like a name for a vagina right?) and again I find that I despise it. Rhianna would be much better off if she stopped trying to look like she's right in the middle of a cosmic O. I mean really, do you have to touch yourself so much in a song about you and your boyfriend breaking up? Why you gotta be so nasty talking about whats left of last night on your sheets, don't you put a towel down for crying out loud?...............And fix your bra strap, you dirtier than X-tina lookin ho!

Okay..okay, maybe she's not a ho, and to be fair she's not dirty looking. Well she looks like she could have crabs or something. A secret kind of dirty as apposed to an obvious "I have dirt all over me" dirty. I just get really fired up over Na-Na and I don't like her for obvious reasons:

-She has about 2 octaves in which she can comfortably sing
-When she does sing, its about stupid things
-She doesn't write her own songs and can't sing someone else's songs as though she did.

It also doesn't help that any time I hear "What's My Name", I walk around the rest of the day saying "Oh NA-NA WHAT'S MY NAME?". It's almost as horrible as walking around saying "ra ra ah-ah-ahh roma ra-ah-ahhh, gaga ooo la la, want your bad romance"...almost.


Pretty girl though. Some pretty girls should just shut their mouths though. Become a model, Rhianna! Stop ruining music, please! Just cause Jay Z says you've got talent, doesn't mean you actually do. That just means Na-Na got a big ole butt and Jigga wants it on his face.

-D

Monday, May 9, 2011

Lets go!!!


1. This song may be "old news" but I still love it.



2. This song is not old news because rap on the radio has become an echo. For some reason, rappers would rather record 2 verses and then have them dubbed to create a 4 minute song (see: Birthday by Jerimih...or don't cause its disgusting and I always think "if this song was sung by a girl it'd sound like a song about golden showers")


...anyway, Chris Brown used to be on my shit list because I didn't realize at the time that Rhianna is a cunt and even a cunt can and should get pimp slapped. Don't act like you've never met a girl that really just needs a good smack in the face because we all have. Should it ever be in a moving vehicle? no, cause that shit is dangerous.

Since his bow tied apologies I've realized that you can love a man for being talented, and still hate him for being a probable douche. "Look At Me" and "She Ain't You" are some great songs. His dancing is fantastical and I guarantee you his face, body and *clears throat* are all BANGIN. So why not like Chris Brown again? It seems like a good investment of my fandom, yours too.

-D

Friday, May 6, 2011

Juda-Juda AH AH

I am not a Lady Gaga fan. That being said...I know every one of her singles like the back of my hand. This goes to show that Lady Gaga has taken a page from children's songs: repeat repeat repeat!



I will say that I enjoy the video for the plot line, style and aesthetics.Not only could this track be used if they ever recreate Jesus Christ Super Star for a younger audience (trust), I've always held a firm belief that Mary probably had the hots for Judas as well as Jesus causing a major rift between the friends. It happens often and it just very well may have happened to them..should you believe in Jesus, Judas and Mary Magdalene..which some people don't...like Santa and the Toothfairy (to be fair, I also think its plausible that, like the 2003 movie Darkness Falls claims, the tooth fairy is a ghost that eats kids should they sneak a peak of her doin' her biznaz).

I WARN you though....listening to this song will get it stuck in your head. I have been dreaming of this literally god forsaken song for 3 days and its not getting any better. By the end of next week I will know every word, I'm sure of it. You will too, if you listen to it "just this once". It's like ear crack, people. I'm wishing I wore an ear condom.

-D

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

It's been a long time, shouldn't have left you

hello Post! I can't believe my last installment was in December! So much has happened since then and I'm not recapping it for anyone!

The Post will soon change its direction a bit, focusing on a variety of topics. Lets face it, Hollywood is rigged and the stories are just getting too crazy for my time and opinions! On top of the regular "what I think is most interesting in pop culture" posts, the blog will now offer interesting recipes, tips on housekeeping, baby prep tips and advice as well as anything else I want to blog about.


Since becoming a housewife and now as I embark on the journey into motherhood...it just seems right to expand my blogging efforts, right?

To make things even better, I entered a new campaign on BzzAgent.com and am trying out a new site called About.Me.com

So far? Fantastic way to organize your networking profiles!